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Blonde Jokes

19 May 2003
Temecula, CA
This blonde walks into her doctors office and says she needs bigger birth control pills...

The doc says "you mean you need more pills?"
Blonde- "no, I need bigger ones."
Doc- "what do you mean bigger ones?"
Blonde- "the ones you gave me are too small...they keep falling out."

:eek: :biggrin:
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LOL :)

Deja Vu.
I just received the newest issue of Maxim magazine and this joke is in the funnies section of the June 2005 issue. What a coincidence that I read this less than five minutes before I logged onto NSXPrime.
A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving. The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police. A police officer pulled the car over. A blonde rolls down the window and says, " Officer, I'm so glad you are here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting it!" The officer looks at her, then says, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."
There were three women who were at the gynecologist having pre-natal checkups. The doctor asked the first woman "in what position was the baby conceived?"

"He was on top," she replied.
"You will have a boy!" the doctor exclaimed.

The second woman was asked the same question.
"I was on top," was the reply.
"You will have a baby girl!" said the doctor.

With this, the third women, a blonde, burst into tears.
"What's the matter?" asked the doc.
"Am I going to have puppies?".....
A blonde was looking to make some extra money so was going round the neighbourhood looking for odd-jobs.
At one home, the owner asked if she could paint - she said "Sure!"
So he told her where to find the supplies in the shed at the back & told her to paint the porch at the side of the house.
She came back to the door 3 hrs later and knocked at the door - the owner was surprised to see her finished & remarked so and asked if she had done a good job ...
Oh yes, she exclaimed - & by the way, it's not a Porsche, it's a Ferrari .....
LMAO :biggrin: Keep 'em coming!!!

What do you call a blonde standing on her head???

A brunette with bad breath :eek:
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."

When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.

"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"

The blonde nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day."

"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.

"No, from skipping."


Here's a "smart" blonde joke posted on prime over a year ago: