So I was a Walmart

Joined
19 August 2002
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Location
Miami, Florida US
I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

:)

Armando
 
That's freakin' funny. I could just imagine someone, after hearing the first part of your story, discreetly trying to slide off to buy a bag of the stuff, only to hear your punch line.
 
Ahhhaa...............Now I understand why you always want to sniff Hugh's ass when you see him. :biggrin:
 
Story reminds me of an experiment a well-known Media Ecologist conducted. He would randomly ask acquaintances if they had read The New York Times that day. If they said no, he'd tell them about how a study by the University of Minnesota had discovered that chocolate eclaires actually help you burn fat - there's a type of sio-socid acid that speeds up your metabolism. Of course, this is so apparently implausible if you stop and think about it, but he usually got answers of "Really?!? That's great!" or "Yeah, I think I heard about that!" - and his highest rate of success was with, well, sadly, professors. The point he was trying to make was people believe whatever they're told now - our critical thinking skills have been numbed to the point of extinction.
 
DocL said:
Ahhhaa...............Now I understand why you always want to sniff Hugh's ass when you see him. :biggrin:

Man, I am glad I fly under your radar. You and Armando sure have some good exchanges, but I do not think I can play at your level:wink:
 
Shumdit said:
Man, I am glad I fly under your radar. You and Armando sure have some good exchanges, but I do not think I can play at your level:wink:

It's all good and fun until one of us blows an engine. :biggrin:
 
MiamieNeSeX said:
Or you blow a Hugh :)
Armando

Since it won't be me, it must be this Hugh....

hugh-grant.jpg
 
I hope everyone knew that Armando was just using that story from somewhere else. Are some of you gullible enough to think this was his original story?
 
Shumdit said:
I hope everyone knew that Armando was just using that story from somewhere else. Are some of you gullible enough to think this was his original story?
:raising hand: :redface: from the things Mr. Mando has said, I don't think I'd put it past him... :tongue: How hilarious would that be though? Standing in line in Miami (where naivete seems to be in the water), overcrowded store as usual, it would make my day !! ;) :biggrin:
 
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