Re: Are you man enough?
I want the TRUTH! I can handle the truth! Details......
Are you absolutely sure you can handle those Sacto rapscallions? Well while you're cogitating on that, here's a taste of the debauchery that went on just recently.
The 9/27/05 SS Report
Tuesday. Got up about 11 AM. Perfect weather. Boring. 1110 AM Big fight with Ethyl, the day bar-keep over the ice cold Hamns being too ice cold.
1120 AM: Arm wrestled here to a draw. 1123 AM Exhausted; took a nap. 3PM: got up and started planning for the day:
It had been a coon’s age since I had checked in on the NSX Sack-o-tomatoes Club. Since they seem to avoid me
and the Blue Note like the West Nile Virus, I felt obligated to stake out their meeting tonite. Slipped into Bradshaws
with some elderly pinochle players. Don’t think anyone besides Hrant noticed me in the nearby booth with my hat pulled down over my sunglasses, reading the paper, but I witnessed that debacle they seriously referred to as a club meeting. Oh the shame……
….Their Fearless Leader, in the hospital, was fighting for his very consciousness (so, what else is new?) and there they were, carrying on like a hurricane party !!! I was so appalled; I barely choked down my chicken fried steak. Hrant, the VP and director of just about everything, “conducted” the meeting when it was not disrupted by the most unlikely looking pair of clowns :tongue: down at the end of the table. Seems like that big handsome devil Brian was going to travel the country, do something with car shows and manipulate nubile young models who “shake a tail feather” at those gigs. Continual verbal barbs were launched at his bow-tie, suspenders and big hands. Most folks in Sacto have not seen anything like Brian. He’s kind of a quiet Terrell Owens, if there is such a thing. And then there was that Ted guy with his hat on weird, trying to look about ¼ of his age (and not pulling it off, BTW)
I was listening surreptitiously
and began to worry that they were on to me when they moved the next meeting to the newly opened Hooters. Was Hrant trying to shepherd his flock to a place that FL and me would both stand out like a sore thumb? Hrant said details will follow and no one knows better than him that the devil is in the details. And in those bright little orange nylon Hooters shorts too !!!!! Oh yeah, and then the discussion turned to Brian again and how he’d be soon manipulating nubile young things and that logically, he’d have to be back up here at Hooters to get some training. Ted suggested that, in the mean time, he spend time in the fresh produce section of the market, checking for freshness and firmness of anything round.
After much bally-hooing about what manly men they were and how those tight little silicone-implanted Hooter bimbos would swoon over their manly equipment (and cars too), they decided to kill the rest of the Club treasury with a Christmas dinner. Now my notes say that FL always tries to steer them to that high-zoot place in Fair Oaks. Note to self,
I’ll have to gin up a killer proposal for a roast pig and bottles of Boone’s Farm at the Blue Note. Most kids these days never heard of Boone’s Farm, but we got a special stash down in the dungeon/wine cellar at the Blue Note. Literally that’s a place where if we “told you, we’d have to kill ya.” And the entertainment……..Yeah, I could see it now……………me at the piano, tickling those ivories…………..VTec singing some Billy Holiday under smoky blue spot lights. All for $11.95. Better than Hometown Buffet !!! A price so cheap it would make Cal Worthington throw up. :redface: Hmmmmmmmm, got my juices flowing now. Think I’ll take on Ethyl again………………..
