What's wrong with today's youth (18-26 year olds)

[BATMANs]

Because of this "witch hunt" of parents willing to spank the ghost outta kids a couple of decades ago, it has scared parents of laying a hand on their kids for stepping outta line.

Grounding is a joke.

I have theories about the parents being pass/current street pharmaceuticals customers where there seeds and eggs have been damaged, but that's just a theory.

 

[clr1024]

Kids are given too much power at a young age, more so in western cultures. The biggest swing in culture which gives kids this entitled mentality is that the power role between parent and child has reversed in the modern world. By that I mean, children used to live to please their parents, however nowadays parents are living to please their kids, thus giving them more power than they know how to handle. In short from a very young age, they have been allowed to do whatever without reprecussion, throw a tantrum and get a reward...hell do nothing and get a reward. In short they have been told they are great all their lives without actually doing anything, nor ever hearing no. Parents today (not all) sell their kids short on what they are actually capable of or default to, it's easier if I do it. I used to be a resident assistant in college for a couple years, it always amazed me the amount of kids that would show up as freshmen and not know how to cook, do laundry etc, you know basic life skills.


http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/books/2012/07/02/120702crbo_books_kolbert?currentPage=all

http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/94

 

[LoveNSXs]

My immediate thought when seeing the thread title was their parents didn't spank them as kids. this is usually the case. My peers who I choose to be around also tend to have a similar upbringing as I tend to stay away from man-children. I can't stand the behavior you speak of.

Someone said affluenza. this is also plays a nice part...

 

[NSX3tek]

To sum it up, it's the parents' fault.

Case in point. Go to the toy sections, Target or Walmart (if you dare to step foot in there), and hang around there when there are little kids playing (most of the times the parents aren't even there).

After the monsters are done trashing the aisle, toys ransacked all over the floor, see what the parents do.

The good ones will pick it up and explain it to their child.

The ones that don't give a rats ass will walk away and don't bother picking the toys up b/c someone else will do it while their little monster is throwing an epileptic tantrum on the floor and at the same time, cleaning the aisle with the clothes.

If you haven't mold your young ones by junior high (6th grade) and up, it's too late.
After that, forget it. And there's your snowball effect.
Everyone knows that the high school age is the rebellious stage.

 

[Gansan]

I know that everyone realizes it, but I have to point out that there are also many, many young people who are not spoiled, are respectful, do care about others, work hard, and are good people. In fact, it's possible that most young people are this way and it's just the bad apples that stand out in our minds. Because of this, we should temper the ranting with the realization that people are just talking about anecdotes and feeling the confirmation bias rather than working from hard data on all young people's "character."

As Yinzer said, the "kids are spoiled today" meme has been around for generations. It's also the case that many spoiled kids grow up eventually. They learn life's lessons the hard way and pay for it in the form of lost opportunities, lost friendships and relationships, and so on. Have we ever seen spoiled or bratty 60 year olds? Sure, there are some, but it's more rare, and I would bet that some of those mature 60 year olds were not so mature when they were 18 or 23--it's not logical to conclude that everyone in a generation was mature and respectful because of how they are now. We are dynamic beings and wisdom and perspective does accumulate with age.

 

[AdvansCPAP]

My sister has 3 kids all under 10 years old. They have their names on their bedroom wall since birth. They don't share as they have everything of their own. Three of everything. When one of her kids has a birthday, the other two will get presents as well. My parents give the other kids gifts too. They say they feel bad when the non bday kids watch the bday kid open up presents and they have nothing. $20.00 isn't enough, minimum 50.00 says my sister AND HER KID. . I say you get nothing then.


The kids are the product of the surroundings created by the adults around them. Dumb adults = dumb offspring. No surprise and life goes on.

 

[Big_D]

Where do I start?

I also think a lot has a lot to do with the parenting. Disciplining kids takes work, and you absolutely must follow up with what you say...or you lose your credibility.
When your kid does something wrong, its best to talk to them and help them understand why its wrong and then explain the consequences. So they learn the principal of cause and effect...
The hard part comes when you have to invoke the consequences. It takes a lot of time, patience and will power to see it through.

Say your kid breaks a house rule and stays out past their cerfew...you tell them that they cant go out with their friends for a week...you better make sure your significant other is on board and they dont get to go out with their friends for a week.
If 3 days pass and you cave in and let them go out with their friends because they said they were sorry...it sends a powerfull message that Mom and Dad will get mad at first and cave in later on so why worry about it.
Kids love to play both parents to get what they want. Mom says no but maybe if I ask Dad then I can do what I want...Mom and Dad need to communicate every decision before giving the kids an answer so this kind of situation doesnt repeat itself.

I also think the kids need to help around the house and do chores. They should do their own laundry, keep their room clean and pick up after themselves.
Too many parents let their kids do whatever they want and pick up after them...they dont learn responsibility from that.

Kids should also be required to work for anything they want. Want an X-BOX? Well mow some lawns or wash some cars to earn the money. Giving your kid whatever they want isnt teaching them anything but to be lazy.
When you actually work for the things that you have, you appreciate them more and are more likely to take better care of them.

Bottom line: Don't be a "Cool" parent and give your kids everything.
Make them work for the things that they want. When they screw up, take their prize possessions away till they pay the consequences.
Eventually they understand and actually become responsible adults!

 

[LMR]

^^^Some of the best parenting advice posted here or anywhere.^^^

 

[gleibig]

http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/video/give-homeless-teen-graduating-head-class-23921520

 

[SilverStone05]

You do realize the current state of youth today is of the fault of the generation that is criticizing them now and they way they raised them. So in essence, we are to blame as we are the ones that have created these entitled monsters. And by "we" I mean everyone except me since I don't have any kids. :biggrin::smile:

Bingo. I don't have any kids either- but you sure learn a lot of parenting after years of watching parents enable their kids and witnessing what the kids become.

And to the silly wives/mothers who YELL at their husbands for yelling at the kids.

 

[MrHugo]

I am 27. I am sometimes overly ambitious and am lazy at times, but I work very hard on things that I enjoy such as my job. I still think that there is no purpose in life. Why are we here on earth? I do just enough to afford my NSX and the rest of the time I watch youtube videos. I am just starting to understand what "living with in your means" mean. I used to each out everyday, only buy organics, looking for the latest gadgets, buy $500 headphones, $2500 suits, JDM'd my first car with credits cards, live like a baller in college, bought a new S2000 with my internship salary, drink Starbucks like its water, and I got really good at playing holdem. I just handed in my resignation letter to a good paying Engineering job because they had me sorting checks every week. I understand that not every jobs are ideal (or that one should like) but I feel like they are wasting my brain and their money having me doing what a middle school student can do.

Am I a typical me me me Y gen? Its ok to be honest. I found it out the hard way. However, I am very respectful, and I think of others. Thanks OP, all these comments are interesting to read.

 

[Stephen@NCAutoUSA]

Of course the people that are in "Y" generation of the downfall of America is going to chime in now stating age. I mean there's exceptions to every rule and every circumstance.

I think everyone's input on their experience is great in this thread. There just basically needs to be accountability for individuals of their actions, how it's taught can vary by individuals, but Big D had a great post.

It's a vicious never ending cycle, kind of like our government, the problems always going to be there until we admit there's a problem to solve and stop turning a blind eye.

 

[jaja]

I think this thread should be: "What's wrong with 18-26 year olds". Not just today's.

I can't pin a source, but a friend of mine who studied psychology mentioned to me that "narcissism" is most most common in ages 20-25. Those tendencies typically drop off with age. That's why "youths these days" has been said by middle aged folks every generation..ever. Things like texting etc, is only
occurring THIS generation, because it only existed for THIS generation. I'm positive every generation had it's "thing", be it skateboards, rock and roll, smoking, etc.

Damn youth these days!

Lucas

 

[steveny]

It doesn't help that when they are kids there is this whole everybody gets a medal mentality. I miss the whole kids being taught to use Mrs. Smith and Mr. Jones... It automatically instills some respect. Now adults including teachers and peincipal are all on a first name basis.

It doesn't help that when they are kids there is this whole everybody gets a medal mentality. I miss the whole kids being taught to use Mrs. Smith and Mr. Jones... It automatically instills some respect. Now adults including teachers and peincipal are all on a first name basis.

my kids school it's mr. Mrs. No first names! But the whole everybody gets a medal thing is annoying and present. Friggen tee-ball is always a tie. Kinda sad IMO. There is winners and losers in life and that should be taught from an early age IMO. Most if not all the parents aren't happy with the "always a tie" deal.
And then were at a school meeting with other parents, the introduction to school meeting for first timers. This lady gets up and asks if the school can NOT offer snacks to the kids because she doesn't want her kids eating ice cream and the like... that her kid would have to pay for with cash. We'll lady instead of subjecting ALL kids to your desires how about just not putting any money in your kids pocket and they can't buy snacks. Problem solved but doesn't allow her the control which is what she really wanted. Not everybody likes tofu and not everybody likes ice cream, that's ok... or at least it use to be.

- - - Updated - - -

I'm with you Rob. I'm still uncomfortable using my best friend's parents' names even after 30+ years. Not only that, it's impossible to enforce when every adult, whether parents, the reverend down the street, principal or teacher all introduce themselves by their 1st name. I'm not even religious and I call the reverend "Pastor Rob". I would feel awkward just calling him Rob, which is how my kids know him.

It may seem like such a little thing, but I don't think it really is little if you look at the big picture. Also with respect also sometimes comes a certain amount of healthy fear. I want my kids to feel a bit afraid that if they're out of line there will be consequences. Around my house, the worse consequences are a timeout for a few minutes or losing of media time. Granted, my kids are pretty polite and generally on good behavior, but they definitely don't have that same healthy fear of authority figures that I had when I was their age.

If I yell at them, my wife lays into me like it's the end of the world. Thankfully they almost never bring me to that point.

My daughters believe that when telling a lie their tongue turns color but only daddy can see it. My six year old can not tell me a lie without trying to hide her tongue. Hopefully there will be a subconscious tell as she gets older.

 

[gmeads]

There are a lot of valid observations in this thread. In all of this, I do have to say that I have some remorse for the rising generation. We have provided them a system and culture that is increasingly more difficult to thrive within. With that in mind, there has to be some level of responsibility taken on the part of preceding generations. After all, the rising generation is a product of the upbringing we have provided within the society we created. My 2 cents ...

 

[rj45]

Having rented my suite for a few years now, I must say you really lose faith in humanity. Age doesn't really matter, the bottom of the barrel of humanity is really terrible. Renters do things I would not even consider and I am generally a prick. Everyone has a nightmare story.

I understand that some people have good reasons to rent, but I have never rented and my family was poor. I never made what I would consider a lot of money but I had a new c5 corvette when I was 20 something ( well 10k miles on it). That would be around 1998 I guess. When I bought my 300zx before that I remember not getting cheese on a cheeseburger at mcd's because that was 10 cents. My checks where 450$ every two weeks how the fuck I survived I don't know. I remember not having money for gas. I once worked 6 months without a day off form 9-9 Anyway my point is that renters already have a mark against them in my book, if you know what you want in life you generally don't rent and you own a nsx maybe...

My Wifes brother is 27, he lives at home and just bought a brand spanking new mazda 3 because he his old 2013 mazda 3 got into a fender bender accident around 2k damage. I'm like wtf. you think you can get a new car because you lost 2k? I just don't get it, the car is basically new. Obviously you never wanted it in the first place and of course he has no job and lives at home. WTF.













RJ