Well if that's the case then why not sign it. No matter what the argument is there is not a good reason not to sign one, well unless you are marring Paris Hilton or Britney spears or something like that. Then defiantly try to not sign one.
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Get Married - Yeah or Nay?
- Thread starter Ski_Banker
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Well if that's the case then why not sign it. No matter what the argument is there is not a good reason not to sign one, well unless you are marring Paris Hilton or Britney spears or something like that. Then defiantly try to not sign one.
I don't think it's a question of why not. More like a question of why? I have a feeling that divorces with prenups end up going to the courtroom no matter what for some serious litigation if there's a decent amount at stake.
Again, I'm not against a marriage ceremony, just entering a state contract.
You've got to give me a good reason 'why' way before I even think about the 'why not'.
You must not have been in a serious, long relationship, where you were certain that she was the one. Well, not one that ended otherwise at least. Do you really think that all the people who've been burned in a nasty divorce thought for a minute that they would be in the position they were in while they were on the alter saying 'I do'? Remember, love is blind and hindsight is 20/20.
dead on, on all points
Ive still yet to here one benifit for me of getting legally married by the state.
I think better than 50% know. I know for me when I was single I could tell VERY quickly how things would go down begween myself and some girl. I called almost everyone of them on the money. One of the few that got me, was planning and I wasn't seeing, was the one who took the dog from my other post. Other than her and maybe one other I knew mostly within a few days what any one girl was all about.
My future wife will probably search through all the posts I made here and this will start a fight in a few years, lol. I do agree with number 4 though.
Reminds me of this article:
Originally in Forbes, archived here:
http://agreatnotion.livejournal.com/553587.html
.
"Don't Marry Career Women
by Michael Noer
Forbes.com
August 21, 2006
Guys: A word of advice. Marry pretty women or ugly ones. Short ones or tall ones. Blondes or brunettes. Just, whatever you do, don't marry a woman with a career.
Why? Because if many social scientists are to be believed, you run a higher risk of having a rocky marriage. While everyone knows that marriage can be stressful, recent studies have found professional women are more likely to get divorced, more likely to cheat, less likely to have children, and, if they do have kids, they are more likely to be unhappy about it. A recent study in Social Forces, a research journal, found that women--even those with a "feminist" outlook--are happier when their husband is the primary breadwinner.
Not a happy conclusion, especially given that many men, particularly successful men, are attracted to women with similar goals and aspirations. And why not? After all, your typical career girl is well-educated, ambitious, informed and engaged. All seemingly good things, right? Sure…at least until you get married. Then, to put it bluntly, the more successful she is the more likely she is to grow dissatisfied with you. Sound familiar?
In Pictures: Nine Reasons To Steer Clear Of Career Women
Many factors contribute to a stable marriage, including the marital status of your spouse's parents (folks with divorced parents are significantly more likely to get divorced themselves), age at first marriage, race, religious beliefs and socio-economic status. And, of course, many working women are indeed happily and fruitfully married--it's just that they are less likely to be so than non-working women. And that, statistically speaking, is the rub.
To be clear, we're not talking about a high-school dropout minding a cash register. For our purposes, a "career girl" has a university-level (or higher) education, works more than 35 hours a week outside the home and makes more than $30,000 a year.
If a host of studies are to be believed, marrying these women is asking for trouble. If they quit their jobs and stay home with the kids, they will be unhappy ( Journal of Marriage and Family, 2003). They will be unhappy if they make more money than you do ( Social Forces, 2006). You will be unhappy if they make more money than you do ( Journal of Marriage and Family, 2001). You will be more likely to fall ill ( American Journal of Sociology). Even your house will be dirtier ( Institute for Social Research).
Why? Well, despite the fact that the link between work, women and divorce rates is complex and controversial, much of the reasoning is based on a lot of economic theory and a bit of common sense. In classic economics, a marriage is, at least in part, an exercise in labor specialization. Traditionally men have tended to do "market" or paid work outside the home and women have tended to do "non-market" or household work, including raising children. All of the work must get done by somebody, and this pairing, regardless of who is in the home and who is outside the home, accomplishes that goal. Nobel laureate Gary S. Becker argued that when the labor specialization in a marriage decreases--if, for example, both spouses have careers--the overall value of the marriage is lower for both partners because less of the total needed work is getting done, making life harder for both partners and divorce more likely. And, indeed, empirical studies have concluded just that.
In 2004, John H. Johnson examined data from the Survey of Income and Program Participation and concluded that gender has a significant influence on the relationship between work hours and increases in the probability of divorce. Women's work hours consistently increase divorce, whereas increases in men's work hours often have no statistical effect. "I also find that the incidence in divorce is far higher in couples where both spouses are working than in couples where only one spouse is employed," Johnson says. A few other studies, which have focused on employment (as opposed to working hours) have concluded that working outside the home actually increases marital stability, at least when the marriage is a happy one. But even in these studies, wives' employment does correlate positively to divorce rates, when the marriage is of "low marital quality."
The other reason a career can hurt a marriage will be obvious to anyone who has seen their mate run off with a co-worker: When your spouse works outside the home, chances increase they'll meet someone they like more than you. "The work environment provides a host of potential partners," researcher Adrian J. Blow reported in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, "and individuals frequently find themselves spending a great deal of time with these individuals."
There's more: According to a wide-ranging review of the published literature, highly educated people are more likely to have had extra-marital sex (those with graduate degrees are 1.75 more likely to have cheated than those with high school diplomas.) Additionally, individuals who earn more than $30,000 a year are more likely to cheat.
And if the cheating leads to divorce, you're really in trouble. Divorce has been positively correlated with higher rates of alcoholism, clinical depression and suicide. Other studies have associated divorce with increased rates of cancer, stroke, and sexually-transmitted disease. Plus divorce is financially devastating. According to one recent study on "Marriage and Divorce's Impact on Wealth," published in The Journal of Sociology, divorced people see their overall net worth drop an average of 77%.
So why not just stay single? Because, academically speaking, a solid marriage has a host of benefits beyond just individual "happiness." There are broader social and health implications as well. According to a 2004 paper entitled "What Do Social Scientists Know About the Benefits of Marriage?" marriage is positively associated with "better outcomes for children under most circumstances," higher earnings for adult men, and "being married and being in a satisfying marriage are positively associated with health and negatively associated with mortality." In other words, a good marriage is associated with a higher income, a longer, healthier life and better-adjusted kids.
A word of caution, though: As with any social scientific study, it's important not to confuse correlation with causation. In other words, just because married folks are healthier than single people, it doesn't mean that marriage is causing the health gains. It could just be that healthier people are more likely to be married."
AKA in Canada while filling out any paper work last name first..B.J. A
Shoot, I know... I've done stupid things in relationships before and now when I look back, the only excuse is that I was thinking with my TOOL, not my brain!
I read that last line and it made me laugh. Isn't that the case for all men and marriages?:biggrin:
If we all just thought with our tool life would be so much easier! And more fun! :biggrin:
... and more itchy! :redface:
Ski_Banker
Suspended
Official UPDATE
Dawn, aka Miamimermaid, PLEASE -- stop asking me to marry you.
I know this is a great thread and all, and you have plenty to say, but seriously - let others chime in here...
Dawn, aka Miamimermaid, PLEASE -- stop asking me to marry you.
I know this is a great thread and all, and you have plenty to say, but seriously - let others chime in here...
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i skimmed some of the reply's.
I got married when i was 24. at that time i was not ready to get married. why did i do it? its a long story that does not involve children. after 2 or 3 very rough years things got better. why stick with someone for 2 or 3 rough years... we are both stubborn people and neither one of us wanted to be the quitter. a benefit of the military is you get to have time apart from your spouse. my first deployment saved our marriage. while i was gone i realized that she was not as evil as i thought she was and i was not as great as i thought i was. we are getting ready to celebrate 6 years at the end of this month. i can not honestly say i have a great wife, that puts up with all my crap.
would i get married again? i don't know for sure. i tell people no, its not worth the work. i did not realize how much work a marriage is. but i know one thing if my wife left me or died i would be in a world of hurt. i never was the run around type. but that's just me.
I got married when i was 24. at that time i was not ready to get married. why did i do it? its a long story that does not involve children. after 2 or 3 very rough years things got better. why stick with someone for 2 or 3 rough years... we are both stubborn people and neither one of us wanted to be the quitter. a benefit of the military is you get to have time apart from your spouse. my first deployment saved our marriage. while i was gone i realized that she was not as evil as i thought she was and i was not as great as i thought i was. we are getting ready to celebrate 6 years at the end of this month. i can not honestly say i have a great wife, that puts up with all my crap.
would i get married again? i don't know for sure. i tell people no, its not worth the work. i did not realize how much work a marriage is. but i know one thing if my wife left me or died i would be in a world of hurt. i never was the run around type. but that's just me.
(one word)---> PRENUP!
Why is it (the majority of the time) the man wears black, whereas the woman wears white on their wedding day? Makes you wonder...
Why is it (the majority of the time) the man wears black, whereas the woman wears white on their wedding day? Makes you wonder...
id go for lindsay lohan so i can take her mercedes slr:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin: after hitting that:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:
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Same boat but not nervous having kids. LOL I get to shoot away. 2 bullets though for two kids is max for me. If it doesn't happen then it doesn't. I haven't hit my one year mark yet but Nov time will. I had to leave 3 weeks after my marriage back out to Iraq. Been tough but she is a fighter and great supporter in the car hobby and whatever I do. Ask many of the Texas drivers on the run when she hangs with them on the twisties and highway LOL:tongue: Prior to being married we lived together for 12 years as best friends and only dated the first three months till it started to affect my college years. Somthing hit when I told myself I have to move on to a new step. Out of the blew in front of the family at her worst point I asked her. A great surprise to her before leaving on my first deployment out here. Our wedding we felt like rock stars with all the bells and whistles. Pretty expensive but I will only do it once. After this it's lone ranger but I highly doubt it will happen. So as for marriage for all you fellas, it's about finding that sole mate that wil massage and do anything for you consistently for 12 years everyday unless I am gone without complaint. I can not complain.
-g-
This thread is too funny. I've been married twice. My first wife and I are good friends. In fact we had lunch when she was in town recently. We've been divorced for years and she has remarried. We were just too young when we were married, I was in the Army, and we only lived together for nine months during the first three years of our marriage.
Now my second marriage...
I was married for seven years. I thought it was great. I was very happy and we had a great relationship. Now...my money managers wire my funds to me on the second business day of the month. Well it was the second business day of the month so I thought I would check and see how much they sent. That's when I noticed a $10,000 withdrawl. I called my banker and asked what the withdrawl was about. He told me was for so-and-so family practice attorney. My banker told me I was getting divorced!
You don't even want to think about how much that cost me, but a little hint would be that she got my ENTIRE art collection. Don't think about the money she got. It'll make YOU cry. Plus I had just purchased a new home less than three months before discovering I was getting divorced. Call me Mr. Blindside.
Would I get married again? Sure. Just as soon as pigs could fly.
Now I am having more fun than I ever had in my life. Not bitter, just getting on with my life and enjoying the benefits of being single. I am over 40 and there are tons of women. Why would I get married, or even have a serious relationship? Thank goodness there were no children involved in either divorce.
Oh, if you're serious or thinking about marriage with a really hot looking Scottish chick, PM me before you pull the trigger.:biggrin:
Now my second marriage...
I was married for seven years. I thought it was great. I was very happy and we had a great relationship. Now...my money managers wire my funds to me on the second business day of the month. Well it was the second business day of the month so I thought I would check and see how much they sent. That's when I noticed a $10,000 withdrawl. I called my banker and asked what the withdrawl was about. He told me was for so-and-so family practice attorney.
My banker told me I was getting divorced!You don't even want to think about how much that cost me, but a little hint would be that she got my ENTIRE art collection.
Don't think about the money she got. It'll make YOU cry. Plus I had just purchased a new home less than three months before discovering I was getting divorced. Call me Mr. Blindside.Would I get married again? Sure. Just as soon as pigs could fly.
Now I am having more fun than I ever had in my life. Not bitter, just getting on with my life and enjoying the benefits of being single. I am over 40 and there are tons of women. Why would I get married, or even have a serious relationship? Thank goodness there were no children involved in either divorce.
Oh, if you're serious or thinking about marriage with a really hot looking Scottish chick, PM me before you pull the trigger.:biggrin:
This thread is too funny. I've been married twice. My first wife and I are good friends. In fact we had lunch when she was in town recently. We've been divorced for years and she has remarried. We were just too young when we were married, I was in the Army, and we only lived together for nine months during the first three years of our marriage.
Now my second marriage...
I was married for seven years. I thought it was great. I was very happy and we had a great relationship. Now...my money managers wire my funds to me on the second business day of the month. Well it was the second business day of the month so I thought I would check and see how much they sent. That's when I noticed a $10,000 withdrawl. I called my banker and asked what the withdrawl was about. He told me was for so-and-so family practice attorney.
You don't even want to think about how much that cost me, but a little hint would be that she got my ENTIRE art collection.
Would I get married again? Sure. Just as soon as pigs could fly.
Now I am having more fun than I ever had in my life. Not bitter, just getting on with my life and enjoying the benefits of being single. I am over 40 and there are tons of women. Why would I get married, or even have a serious relationship? Thank goodness there were no children involved in either divorce.
Oh, if you're serious or thinking about marriage with a really hot looking Scottish chick, PM me before you pull the trigger.:biggrin:
Post of the month right there.
I got this image in my head of you getting married and instead of releasing doves someone lets a bunch of flying pigs go. LOL. The pigs are all crashing into the crowd and knocking over the cake. ROTFLMAO. :biggrin:
This thread is too funny. I've been married twice. My first wife and I are good friends. In fact we had lunch when she was in town recently. We've been divorced for years and she has remarried. We were just too young when we were married, I was in the Army, and we only lived together for nine months during the first three years of our marriage.
Now my second marriage...
I was married for seven years. I thought it was great. I was very happy and we had a great relationship. Now...my money managers wire my funds to me on the second business day of the month. Well it was the second business day of the month so I thought I would check and see how much they sent. That's when I noticed a $10,000 withdrawl. I called my banker and asked what the withdrawl was about. He told me was for so-and-so family practice attorney.
You don't even want to think about how much that cost me, but a little hint would be that she got my ENTIRE art collection.
Would I get married again? Sure. Just as soon as pigs could fly.
Now I am having more fun than I ever had in my life. Not bitter, just getting on with my life and enjoying the benefits of being single. I am over 40 and there are tons of women. Why would I get married, or even have a serious relationship? Thank goodness there were no children involved in either divorce.
Oh, if you're serious or thinking about marriage with a really hot looking Scottish chick, PM me before you pull the trigger.:biggrin:
hahaha great post! It's funny man because the friends I goto the gym with are all in great shape in between 32-36 and they told me this "If you look good why get married because they come to you and THEY will deal with you if you flip the tables" It's so true. I really don't see myself getting married right now, it may change but I will protect myself if I do, if she does not like a prenup that will be the 1st problem, I think a prenup deleverages them.
This thread is too funny. I've been married twice. My first wife and I are good friends. In fact we had lunch when she was in town recently. We've been divorced for years and she has remarried. We were just too young when we were married, I was in the Army, and we only lived together for nine months during the first three years of our marriage.
Now my second marriage...
I was married for seven years. I thought it was great. I was very happy and we had a great relationship. Now...my money managers wire my funds to me on the second business day of the month. Well it was the second business day of the month so I thought I would check and see how much they sent. That's when I noticed a $10,000 withdrawl. I called my banker and asked what the withdrawl was about. He told me was for so-and-so family practice attorney.
You don't even want to think about how much that cost me, but a little hint would be that she got my ENTIRE art collection.
Would I get married again? Sure. Just as soon as pigs could fly.
Now I am having more fun than I ever had in my life. Not bitter, just getting on with my life and enjoying the benefits of being single. I am over 40 and there are tons of women. Why would I get married, or even have a serious relationship? Thank goodness there were no children involved in either divorce.
Oh, if you're serious or thinking about marriage with a really hot looking Scottish chick, PM me before you pull the trigger.:biggrin:
Woah
Sorry to hear of your experience. Makes my apprehension of marriage get a bit stronger.
Thanks Steve. You got me laughing at that.:biggrin: Actually the wedding was great. Got married in a castle in Scotland. It was just the end that was a mess.:biggrin:
Oh, I forgot to vote in the poll, but you can put down in the "when pigs could fly" catagory.:tongue:
Eddy,
this stuff is funny but so true.... but someone please explain the tabasco thing to me!
It's supposed to kill your little swimmers
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I didn't vote, because there was not a category that I fit into. Happily married for almost 13 years. 14th anniversary coming up next Friday.:smile:
If you are ready to settle down, then it is the first step to "yeah". If not, then is "nay". If you do march down the marriage path, read my signature below.:wink:
If you are ready to settle down, then it is the first step to "yeah". If not, then is "nay". If you do march down the marriage path, read my signature below.:wink: