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Divorce
- Thread starter Sarge
- Start date
I would like to get married again some day, but at this stage of my life with all that I have done, there is no way in hell I'm doing so without a prenup. My net worth has increased tremendously since my first marriage and I can't risk losing half of it.
LOL
General idea is getting to know someone and finding out their likes or dislikes ( or just hitting until she gets to attached ). You can always tell how smart/tactician a woman is if she let's you do all the talking. Women who do all the talking will pretty much tell you everything within an hours time and not realize it. Always pay attention on dates even while having fun. People don't know what to lie to you about when they first meet you.
I could see a prenup being a harder thing for a young woman to swallow ( no jokes :biggrin: ) but again a more established woman should have no problem with the prenup as they have things to and I'm sure they don't wish to lose those things should problems not be able to get worked through.
Oh also meant to say I completely disagree with the women having logically removed comment. What's more logical than "cheat on me and I get half yo sh*t!" That is to the point logical.
One thing we have neglected is that in some cases the woman getting half is very fair. If the two of you start out poor and she "helps" build the marriage financially then she should get half. Plenty of women sacrifice and but bruthas through school and then when he gets going good he runs off with the secretary/nurse/ junior partner whatever. In those case if she made him she should get half. Everything else is bullsh*t!
I've a well to do Aunt that told her ex no lawyers ( she's one ) you take your stuff and go. Be man she said.
Yeah they kinda ruin it for the guys that want to be serious. Lots of guys end up with damaged goods because of this.
A little of topic there are some states where women cannot file for marriage under the age of 21.I think its one them midwestern states.
Does the state provide assistance from lawyers in divorce cases free or are there conditions such as income etcc?
Marriage under the age of twenty one shouldn't be allowed anyway.
Finally a plus for the CA legal system
As the female weighing in on this matter, I would agree with you. (Maybe most chicks wouldn't. I don't know.) :::shrug:::
After 2 marriages, I say I'm done. My token phrase is, "It'll take an act of congress to get me back down THAT aisle again" but I'm also one who never says never.
If I ever found myself in a situation where I was seriously dating and looking at something long term with a man who had enough $ that a prenupt would be logical, I wouldn't be offended at all and would probably bring it up in the first place.
I look at like this: If it's love, the money is gravy. If we get worst case scenario and things don't work out, I have no right to take what was his before we met. Child support, yes. Spousal support... maybe in certain circumstances. But, these $100+million payouts to women who were married to their husbands for all of 4 minutes. Whatever.
Like I said, divorce shows a person's true character.
exactly.
(I feel like I might be coming off as a total traitor to my sex. :::shrug:::: What can I say? I don't understand most women any more than most men do. I always say that my "Ovary Code" got lost in the mail.) :biggrin:
Been there and done that. The church girl was the worst of the three! She always said "The Lord Will Provide" as she was giving my money to the losers in church. When came time to split, it wasn't the lord providing, it was me.........
exactly.
(I feel like I might be coming off as a total traitor to my sex. :::shrug:::: What can I say? I don't understand most women any more than most men do. I always say that my "Ovary Code" got lost in the mail.) :biggrin:
Not at all. I always like having female non sexual friends because they'll let you know when a woman is lying and they can read women much quicker than I can.
Hey let's be real there are a lot more women than men and woman want to get married more than men do so THEY LIE AND HIDE THEIR REAL PERSONALITY. Just life is all and I accept it:wink:
I bought a house in Santa Barbara 20 years before I ever met her. Her name was NEVER on on the deed for the property. She lived in the house for two years while we were married, then I sold the house and we moved to another state. Two years later the divorce process started.
I ended up having to pay her a percentage of the appreciation on the house for the two years she lived in it. I had to hire all of these fricking forensic apprasers and everything.
If anyone wants information regarding what to do when you are going through a divorce with a she-devil, PM me.:biggrin:
Forgive the language but YOU ARE BULLSH*TTING
I couldn't make that stuff up. That's only one example...
Yes that does make sense. But it is different than her getting 50% of the value of the house after being married 2 years. Say the house is 500,000 and appreciated 50,000 in the last 2yrs. Your ordered to pay her 25% of that 50,000 or $12,500. That is alot different that $250,000. Meh.. I'm done thinking about it. I've got my house, but it looks like I had some looters ransac it.. It was only 1 though.. :redface:
I just wish I would've been bought out and have been liquid right now. Instead I've got less income and higher expenses.
Funny story in my case she screwed herself out of alot cash because she was GREEEDY!! I had the place appraised originally before the real downswing and offered to pay her half the equity, however she would pay back to me her half or 2.5% of the realtors commision fee because I was taking all of the financial risk and assuming the full mortgage + cashing her out. Well that wasn't "right" as she called it (and its not commonplace) and so I told her to put it on the market... Well we know how the housing market has been and when it wouldn't sell 5 months later I had to have the house re-appraised and it had dropped about 50k+ (biggest drop from before burst to near bottom for the area). Well she was paid her half based on the new value plus paid me 2.5% costing her over 25K wasted... and I was just trying to be the "nice guy" and get it done quickly. I am so glad she declined the original offer.
Karma already had started working! :biggrin:
A few things, Wingz:
With me, it goes for both sexes. My bullshit detector is set at super sensitive. I am generally cynical enough that I think most peope are full of crap most of the time. Lying just seems like such a waste of time and energy to me and sorting through lies even more so. So, yeah, I have very little tolerance for it.
SOME women. Again, like with a lot of things that are typical for most women, I dont include myself in this group. But, I do agree that females push for marriage more than men.
For me, I've done it. Twice. The second one will become an official seperation in a few months. The idea of being single again thrills me. I'm not against relationships. I just prefer the ones where I have my own space, make my own rules, etc. It's just so much easier when you can send them home at the end of the night. :biggrin:
Again... what a waste of time and energy. In my world, what you see is what you get. Sometimes I dont feel like putting on makeup. Sometimes I dye my hair pink. Sometimes I want to be left the hell alone and then sometimes I want to watch the baseball game and you're talking about your buddies is not something I want to listen to while it's on.
I'm a bit too earthy for a lot of people but I've found that by laying it all out on the table from the start allows me to quickly sort through the people who would benefit from having me in their lives... and vice versa. Same goes for someone you're planning on spending your life with. They need to know what makes me tick from the beginning because I dont have it in me to pretend long enough to con them into marriage, which I think a lot of women do. I think it's all a show until they get that ring on their finger. ......if that all makes any sense.
:::::steering back to the original topic now:::::
With me, it goes for both sexes. My bullshit detector is set at super sensitive. I am generally cynical enough that I think most peope are full of crap most of the time. Lying just seems like such a waste of time and energy to me and sorting through lies even more so. So, yeah, I have very little tolerance for it.
SOME women. Again, like with a lot of things that are typical for most women, I dont include myself in this group. But, I do agree that females push for marriage more than men.
For me, I've done it. Twice. The second one will become an official seperation in a few months. The idea of being single again thrills me. I'm not against relationships. I just prefer the ones where I have my own space, make my own rules, etc. It's just so much easier when you can send them home at the end of the night. :biggrin:
Again... what a waste of time and energy. In my world, what you see is what you get. Sometimes I dont feel like putting on makeup. Sometimes I dye my hair pink. Sometimes I want to be left the hell alone and then sometimes I want to watch the baseball game and you're talking about your buddies is not something I want to listen to while it's on.
I'm a bit too earthy for a lot of people but I've found that by laying it all out on the table from the start allows me to quickly sort through the people who would benefit from having me in their lives... and vice versa. Same goes for someone you're planning on spending your life with. They need to know what makes me tick from the beginning because I dont have it in me to pretend long enough to con them into marriage, which I think a lot of women do. I think it's all a show until they get that ring on their finger. ......if that all makes any sense.
:::::steering back to the original topic now:::::
Good for you! I honestly don't think you can be a "nice guy" in a divorce situation.
This thread got me thinking about a female friend of mine who recently went through a divorce. They have one kid and he has two daughters from a previous marriage. They had a large home that they just moved into. Now she's a flat out babe and he's cheating on her ( why do men cheat on the pretty ones
). All of a sudden ( her side of the story ) he tells her that because she's not making a large breakfast every morning they need to split as she's not contributing to the marriage. Long story short she's now living in basically a cubicle ( LOL sorry but her house was so small every time you flush the toilet it unlocked the front door ) he has the old house and everything else with limited child support. He told her upfront NO LAWYERS we'll settle things between ourselves in a rational manner ( i.e I made all this before you came along so your not getting half my sh*t ).
There are guys that have their cake and eat it too. I use to think of that guy as a real b*st*rd because of what he did to my friend now I'm not so sure
If the female has her shit together and can live on her own it will be no problem, in fact I have seen the FEMALE want it if she has a lot going for her. It's a fact that most men make more then the woman and we get screwed if she leaves us. I will NOT get married without one because I worked too damn hard for what I have. If she's a gold digger I can deal with that, I call it the use/use friendship, I buy dinner then PIITB when I get home and she leaves lol :biggrin:
That's called being single not married. If you keep that immature attitude/outlook you will soon be on your third divorce.:wink:
Good for you! I honestly don't think you can be a "nice guy" in a divorce situation.
This thread got me thinking about a female friend of mine who recently went through a divorce. They have one kid and he has two daughters from a previous marriage. They had a large home that they just moved into. Now she's a flat out babe and he's cheating on her ( why do men cheat on the pretty ones
Long story short she's now living in basically a cubicle ( LOL sorry but her house was so small every time you flush the toilet it unlocked the front door ) he has the old house and everything else with limited child support. He told her upfront NO LAWYERS we'll settle things between ourselves in a rational manner ( i.e I made all this before you came along so your not getting half my sh*t ).
There are guys that have their cake and eat it too. I use to think of that guy as a real b*st*rd because of what he did to my friend now I'm not so sure
Well then she was stupid for what she did. Should she get 1/2 of his shit? Nope, she should gain a skill and make her own life. If she was the home maker then she should write it up that way, I feel taking care of kids and a home is a job and should get some pay. My dad left my mom with the house and paid for all our food and such but my mom also never put in any effort to get a good job after we moved out, Lazy who knows but 20 years later she is making 8$ a hour and never went to school or got a trade skill and everytime I see her it's the same thing. How's work mom "It sucks" Okay what are you going to do to change that? "Nothing". lol
And those girls are the exact ones who won't sign a prenup because if they do sign they know they won't ever be able to let their breath out. I can see those bitches from a mile away.
That's suck's sorry to hear that and it make's me once again realize I have a 'Supermom'.
The best run companies have one boss. That boss should be the smartest person in the company. Everyone else should trust that persons opinion and follow it.
The biggest problem is one not understanding that the other is smarter. Or worse yet the dumber one believing they are smarter than the smartest one. This is what usually ruins a marriage and a business.
Now that doesn't mean I think one person has power over the other. I don't think one person should follow everything the other person says. What I am saying is if I am better at negotiating a deal then my wife doesn't butt in. If she is better at dealing with the evictions then I don't butt in.
It's when people get that "no one is going to tell me what to do" attitude that things start to fall apart. Sometimes you need to give orders and sometimes you need to take them. Figure out what each person is good at and stick to it.
I like that insight bud :wink: . My post basically was in reference to what I percieved as a onesided opion/outlook.
While I agree to some extent I have to say that none of the women I have considered getting engaged to would have signed a prenup. Maybe it is a midwest thing but I find that most of my female friends would not sign one either, keep in mind all of these people are from 22-29 and have never been married so maybe that plays into it, but it is not that common in my circle (as small as it is). I am with VegasNSX on this, easy to say, tough to pull off; at least in my experience.
The girl I am dating now makes more than me so I am not sure I want a prenup, unless that is we engineer it so she pays me; that might work!
Kevin
Now we are talking. A pimp has to get paid!!!!:biggrin:
When I got Divorced back in the days, before I owned properties, I was very lucky:tongue: . It was very calm and civil. Prior to Divorce, she told me "why don't we take some time off from each other ", I'm still on my time off and never looked back. She took her stuff and all furniture and I just left with my cloths and Saltwater Reef Tank. Divorced cost was only a few dollars to process papers and signing.
I had this crazy bitch living with me a long time ago, one of many. When she left it was in the middle of the day while I was away. (I have posted a longer version of this on prime before) She took EVERYTHING. And I mean everything. She took the soap out of the shower. She even took the toilet paper off the holder next to the toilet.
I had been out moving vehicles all day with a car trailer and I was filthy. I stood in the shower, no curtain, no soap. Got out and dried off with the smelly dirty t-shirt I had just taken off, no towel. I then went to find my dog she took. It never occured to me until days later but when I checked the bank account, that was empty too.
I got the dog back and most of the money.
She is still single and unhappy.
She even took the toilet paper off the holder next to the toilet. I had been out moving vehicles all day with a car trailer and I was filthy. I stood in the shower, no curtain, no soap. Got out and dried off with the smelly dirty t-shirt I had just taken off, no towel. I then went to find my dog she took. It never occured to me until days later but when I checked the bank account, that was empty too.
I got the dog back and most of the money.
She is still single and unhappy.
I had this crazy bitch living with me a long time ago, one of many. When she left it was in the middle of the day while I was away. (I have posted a longer version of this on prime before) She took EVERYTHING. And I mean everything. She took the soap out of the shower.
I had been out moving vehicles all day with a car trailer and I was filthy. I stood in the shower, no curtain, no soap. Got out and dried off with the smelly dirty t-shirt I had just taken off, no towel. I then went to find my dog she took. It never occured to me until days later but when I checked the bank account, that was empty too.
I got the dog back and most of the money.
She is still single and unhappy.
Went on line one morning to look at my checking account.
Called the bank and asked, "What's that $10,000 withdrawal?"
Banker, "Oh, that's for so and so family practice attorney."
YIKES!!! My banker told me!
I laugh about it now, but I had NO idea.
