"To copy what Apple has done. Poorly."
I'm sorry, in the past 4 years there have been many, many so-called iPhone killers and iPad killers announced.
Kill count so far: zero.
And for you sir I present:
<iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/_6KnGgOVVjs?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
For those of you that have youtube blocked at work:
PHONE TRANSCRIPT:
Tim Cook: Oh hey guys uh what’s up? It’s Tim, Tim Cook here, from Apple.
Lawyer: (Clears throat) Tim, it’s the legal team.
Tim Cook: My hot shot legal team!
Lawyer: Uh, wanted you to see this video. Listen to my impressions… we need to bring out the big guns. Microsoft has just totally ripped off 70 Billion-
Tim Cook: Oh my oh
Lawyer: Whup look: white square.
Tim Cook: What is that?
Lawyer: Patented in 1993, by Apple
Tim Cook: That is IT. Is that? A square device on a pedestal? Oh my God we patented that, like, 20 years ago.
Lawyer: Rectangular gadget, sitting there. Patented. Long time ago…
Tim Cook: Oh my god!
Lawyer: Magnets.
Tim Cook: It’s got magnets?
Lawyer: Patented that. Actually we invented that.
Tim Cook: Magnets?
Lawyer: It’s absurd!
Tim Cook: Magnets? For heaven’s sakes.
Lawyer: We need to do something about this, we need to act NOW.
Tim Cook: Magnets, we patented that do-
Lawyer: LOOK! Windows Logo! We patented the new Windows Logo 5 years ago. Kickstands.
Tim Cook: Apple.
Lawyer: Kickstands.
Tim Cook: Son.
Lawyer: We invented those with the bike!
Tim Cook: All day.
Lawyer: When the bicycle was invented by Apple-
Tim Cook: That’s some jiggly…
Lawyer: Aw look at this.
Tim Cook: Jiggly balls? What’s going on here? I don’t like what’s
Lawyer: Tim! Tim!
Tim Cook: I don’t like what’s happenin’ here.
Lawyer: Tim! Tim snap out of it! This is a slap in the face Tim and we need to bring out the- LOOK! Bouncing balls?
Tim Cook: Oh that’s it. That is such a ripoff.
Lawyer: I’m fed up with this.
Tim Cook: Oh my god. Well what are we gon’ do?
Lawyer: What are we gonna do.
Tim Cook: What are we gonna do.
Lawyer: What are we gonna do…. mmmmmmmm… ahhhhhhhhhhhh!