Incredibly angry right now

[dquarasr2]

Your sister needs someone to show her the way. You may need to be that person. Family is family; they'll be family forever. Think long-term. Be angry now, get over it but then set about, when you are back, to supporting your sister and teach her how to make better choices.

 

[Maximus_NSX]

A wise man once told me that there is nothing more insane than being at odds with what there is. Being angry is exactly that. Being at odds, with what there already is. Being at odds with reality.

I think that being there and in the army, there is plenty to see and be angry about. But a soldier is rightly taught not to look at things and see problems. He is taught to see situations. Then to deal with them accordingly.

If your fellow soldier is shot, do you get caught up in anger or sit and scream about a problem? At that moment, your mind focuses and simply sees a situation. One that requires immediate attention. You do what needs to be done and in there, there is no room for anger. Anger only takes away your energy and your focus.

Don't let your mind run away with stories about how your sister has been throughout her life and how your dad should have acted. Focus on what there is. See the task at hand. There is no anger in that. Remember to always stay HERE, not let your mind go elsewhere. When you do that, you have gone beyond what most ordinary people are capable of doing.

I hope this makes some amount of sense. I have a feeling that if your Grandpa was here, this is what he would be telling you.

Damn Dave, that's really deep. I never knew you had it in you.:wink:

 

[MartinSD]

Greetings

Your dad will still be your dad in 5 years. Your sister will still be your sister. You will have a different NSX. It will still tighten your jaw when you think about it, but it will be one of those stories that all families have.

Had a similar thing happen many years ago when I too got an all expense paid trip to Asia.

Remember the following -- before using a hand grenade, handgun, or knife, but your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye. Do you sit on your helmet whenever you ride in an APC? Do you know why you should? Keep your eyes open and thank you for serving.

cheers,
Martin

 

[MartinSD]

Nick

I let a young Army PFC drive mine one morning in Los Gatos. He was in uniform and getting ready to fly out that morning to go to the east coast and then on to Iraq. If some guy there tells you he drove a Black NSX -- he is not bull shitting you -- contrary to some of the stuff GI's tell each other.

Cheers,
Martin

 

[HTN]

I would make your sister pay for the damage, eventhough Ins is picking up the tab. Sometimes people learn to be more careful when they have to pay for it. Tough love.

 

[mattd]

I let my nephew use my car for an evening for prom and he totaled it (long story made short) I was very angry at the time. It was not worth the 6 months to a year I ignored him. At the time it seemed monumental, now it seems to be the road to get a way better nsx, and I still love my nephew

 

[Hasdrubal]

Wow, I'm surprised this thread is still going. Again, thanks to everyone for the kind words and advice.

I'm still on schedule to be home in a few weeks. I'm not really angry right now, and I have to say, venting here and the support you've all shown has really helped with that.

I don't know exactly what's going to happen when I get home. At this point, it's going to depend a great deal on how my sister acts when I see her. To forgive someone who feels genuine remorse, and who honestly understands what they did was wrong is completely different from forgiving someone who gives you the finger when you ask them to sit down and talk. In the past I've gotten both from her, and not in any sort of pattern getting better or worse.

Either way, hoping for the best.

Nick