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Aging - some personal thoughts
- Thread starter robr
- Start date
robr ... try to get in better shape and eat better.
I know that's hard, but try.
And also try to look forward to the time ahead with your kids.
It will be a great time ... all the stuff kids will get you involved in ... scouting, sports, birthdays, meeting other parents, Christmases and birthday parties, meetings with the relatives, etc etc etc.
The next 20 years are going to be fast and furious.
I have a friend who just turned 40, and he has a 4 yr old and a 1 yr old. He's really into cars, but like you, he's got to make some life changes now ... he's selling his sports car, and he needs to focus more on his wife and family.
That may be one of the biggest challenges ahead ... not being selfish.
Adjust your priorities a bit, and start to find fun in the things you will do with your family. Some of the best times in my life were simple ... taking the kids to the nearest playground and watching them swing, or playing tag with them, etc.
Sure, the bodily things that change with age suck. But you're going to be able to replace those troubles with many more challenges and rewards.
Drunken arm wrestling can't hold a candle to helping coach your childs t-ball team.
PS: I didn't like it when I turned 40, either!
I know that's hard, but try.
And also try to look forward to the time ahead with your kids.
It will be a great time ... all the stuff kids will get you involved in ... scouting, sports, birthdays, meeting other parents, Christmases and birthday parties, meetings with the relatives, etc etc etc.
The next 20 years are going to be fast and furious.
I have a friend who just turned 40, and he has a 4 yr old and a 1 yr old. He's really into cars, but like you, he's got to make some life changes now ... he's selling his sports car, and he needs to focus more on his wife and family.
That may be one of the biggest challenges ahead ... not being selfish.
Adjust your priorities a bit, and start to find fun in the things you will do with your family. Some of the best times in my life were simple ... taking the kids to the nearest playground and watching them swing, or playing tag with them, etc.
Sure, the bodily things that change with age suck. But you're going to be able to replace those troubles with many more challenges and rewards.
Drunken arm wrestling can't hold a candle to helping coach your childs t-ball team.
PS: I didn't like it when I turned 40, either!
I always believe you are only as old as you let yourself be. Finding activities that you enjoy, staying fit, and be happy will keep you feeling forever young.
Aging is inevitable, everyone will have to go through this process, but you have great control of your own health and shape.
I have meet many NSX owners who are old enough to be my dad, honestly never once the thought of "old" came across of my mind even once. I always treat everyone as if they are my age, good or bad. I really enjoy hanging out with people who have something that I can learn from, who are more matured than I am. Sure beats learning life experiences the hard way on my own.
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Additional non related add on:
Fitness is a life style, you choose how you want your body to feel, you choose the shape you want to be in. I wouldn't give up fitness for any amount of money. I rather die if I can't be fit. I do love food and eat anything I want, whenever I want, as much as I want, but I never ever skip my workouts. If I travel, I jog rain or snow.
Moderation is key to everything. Too much of fitness or self-discipline can actually be extremely dangerous and bad for sport performance, not many people talk about "exercise addiction". Sadly many have this addiction and may not be aware.
I have no problem admitting that I fall into this category. I came close to landing in hospital a few times due to overexhaustion and lost feeling of my body a few years ago. My addiction with exercise were a lot of hassle for people around me and made my life totally miserable for a span of 2~3 years. I have made quite a few changes since then, still work out daily (never a day off in past 10 years). I will increase the intensity if necessary, but trying staying away from increasing the duration and frequency.
Exercise addiction-"Individuals with an exercise addiction are characterized by their compulsive exercise behaviors, an overinvolvement in exercise, and the presence of an activity disorder—meaning they exercise at a duration, intensity, and frequency beyond that required for sport. A rigid schedule of intense exercise is maintained, accompanied by strong feelings of guilt when this schedule is violated. These individuals resist the temptation to lapse into nonexercise"
exercising raises endorphins, the exercise addicts work out to feel high. However, soon they need to work out for longer periods of time to maintain that high
Aging is inevitable, everyone will have to go through this process, but you have great control of your own health and shape.
I have meet many NSX owners who are old enough to be my dad, honestly never once the thought of "old" came across of my mind even once. I always treat everyone as if they are my age, good or bad. I really enjoy hanging out with people who have something that I can learn from, who are more matured than I am. Sure beats learning life experiences the hard way on my own.
I really like what you said above. I too at one time believe money was everything until I realized that there are a lot of things money can't buy. A lot of things I want can't be bought by money and a lot of people have money. Money no longer impresses me like it used to be.
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Additional non related add on:
Fitness is a life style, you choose how you want your body to feel, you choose the shape you want to be in. I wouldn't give up fitness for any amount of money. I rather die if I can't be fit. I do love food and eat anything I want, whenever I want, as much as I want, but I never ever skip my workouts. If I travel, I jog rain or snow.
Moderation is key to everything. Too much of fitness or self-discipline can actually be extremely dangerous and bad for sport performance, not many people talk about "exercise addiction". Sadly many have this addiction and may not be aware.
I have no problem admitting that I fall into this category. I came close to landing in hospital a few times due to overexhaustion and lost feeling of my body a few years ago. My addiction with exercise were a lot of hassle for people around me and made my life totally miserable for a span of 2~3 years. I have made quite a few changes since then, still work out daily (never a day off in past 10 years). I will increase the intensity if necessary, but trying staying away from increasing the duration and frequency.
Exercise addiction-"Individuals with an exercise addiction are characterized by their compulsive exercise behaviors, an overinvolvement in exercise, and the presence of an activity disorder—meaning they exercise at a duration, intensity, and frequency beyond that required for sport. A rigid schedule of intense exercise is maintained, accompanied by strong feelings of guilt when this schedule is violated. These individuals resist the temptation to lapse into nonexercise"
exercising raises endorphins, the exercise addicts work out to feel high. However, soon they need to work out for longer periods of time to maintain that high
Good post and we FINALY agree on something. Now if I see a Ferrari it's like who cares? If you see a female in the gym lifting weights to me is super cool. Or when you see someone with 8% or less BF is impressive. It's funny to see all these old / warn out guys driving high end cars and then see them winded after walking up a flight of steps. Keep your health up it's the only thing you have.
So true brother. In my 20's I made money as fast as I could spend it. In my 30's I tried to save as much as I can and exercised as much as I could. In my 40's I've made my fortune and now thinking about the next phase of my life...fatherhood, new career, travel etc. At 45 (this month) I still have no kids and we are talking about starting a family next year...(wifes' 35). I do feel slower now than I did 15 years ago. But at least I still walk (no more full court basketball) every day.
Having a young heart and feeling young are the two most important things once you have security in your lives...(finances, health, family)
Re: Aging - the good news
Sometimes when I have a "feeling old" eye-opener, I'm glad I wont' be around to see how wierd things can or will likely get. I had one with the movie Idiocrasy. :biggrin:
NPR described it this way:
I normally don't watch that kind of low brow slapstick movie, but with the constant barrage of trivia, useless information and worthless change we experience every day, I found a lot of black humor in it. While it was totally predictable as surperficial movies are, it highlighted the real trend of instant gratification and technology for it's own sake.
OK, that's my soul baring for the day. Don't flame me.
Sometimes when I have a "feeling old" eye-opener, I'm glad I wont' be around to see how wierd things can or will likely get. I had one with the movie Idiocrasy. :biggrin:
NPR described it this way:
I normally don't watch that kind of low brow slapstick movie, but with the constant barrage of trivia, useless information and worthless change we experience every day, I found a lot of black humor in it. While it was totally predictable as surperficial movies are, it highlighted the real trend of instant gratification and technology for it's own sake.
OK, that's my soul baring for the day. Don't flame me.
Re: Aging - the good news
By far one of my favorite movies. I see the families with 20 kids every day. I also see the smart families with 1 or 2 kids as well. Either the movie will become fact or all those millions of stupids will be controlled by a few smarties.
Sometimes when I have a "feeling old" eye-opener, I'm glad I wont' be around to see how wierd things can or will likely get. I had one with the movie Idiocrasy. :biggrin:
NPR described it this way:
I normally don't watch that kind of low brow slapstick movie, but with the constant barrage of trivia, useless information and worthless change we experience every day, I found a lot of black humor in it. While it was totally predictable as surperficial movies are, it highlighted the real trend of instant gratification and technology for it's own sake.
OK, that's my soul baring for the day. Don't flame me.
By far one of my favorite movies. I see the families with 20 kids every day. I also see the smart families with 1 or 2 kids as well. Either the movie will become fact or all those millions of stupids will be controlled by a few smarties.
Re: It happened again today !!
Losing track of time. I complained to my computer geek about the home desktop running slow. Then I realized it's over 6 years old !! 6 years????? I work hard not to lose track and say old man shit like that. Damn, I guess I've been having way too much fun. :tongue:
Losing track of time.
I complained to my computer geek about the home desktop running slow. Then I realized it's over 6 years old !! 6 years????? I work hard not to lose track and say old man shit like that. Damn, I guess I've been having way too much fun. :tongue:
For my 40th birthday, I did three things.
- Got myself in shape by running 10-20 miles a week for the last year-- I could hardly run 1/4 mile when I started.
- Had a cardiac stress test and echo cardiagram.
- Had them stick a 5ft thingy up my hubbajoob to make sure the plumbing was ok.
It was kinda like a 60,000 mile check-up. I'd recommend it to anyone. Though I really understand the feeling of getting old, I'll not dwell on it; I'll just deal with the things I can actually control.
Besides, being 20 years old was nice, but I couldn't afford a damn thing.
- Got myself in shape by running 10-20 miles a week for the last year-- I could hardly run 1/4 mile when I started.
- Had a cardiac stress test and echo cardiagram.
- Had them stick a 5ft thingy up my hubbajoob to make sure the plumbing was ok.
It was kinda like a 60,000 mile check-up. I'd recommend it to anyone. Though I really understand the feeling of getting old, I'll not dwell on it; I'll just deal with the things I can actually control.
Besides, being 20 years old was nice, but I couldn't afford a damn thing.
My mothers boyfriend is 85 years old. He had a gov. job where he sat in one place for the whole day. I have never seen him exercise in his whole life.
Another family friend ran Marathons, he was an awesome runner. Dropped dead at 49 from a heart attack. I don't think exercise has much to do with longevity.
I don't think you can compare two different people, but I think it's fairly safe to say that in 99% of cases, someone that exercises is healthier and likely to live longer than if they don't. Obviously there are exceptions, like pre-existing medical conditions that one finds out about the hard way when exercising. A friend of mine is 39 and is a marathon runner and suffered a stroke when he was 35. He was in the top shape of his life. Who knows what brought that on, but I think that's more of an exception than a rule. Thankfully he recovered 100% and he ran Chicago this year (until it was canceled partway through anyway).
I did the same as nsx2tall (minus the plumbing check). I did a stress test with the treadmill, had an echo cardiogram done, and run several times a week. I'm still somewhat overweight but I know I have more energy and am better off than if I didn't exercise. Plus I recently purchased quite a bit of life insurance from Banner (at the urging of others in thie forum, thanks) and was put into the absolute highest tier as far as a health rating went (ie, lowest cost). I don't know why, but perhaps the positive results of all my heart tests helped. I weighed in at 209 lbs and my cholesterol was over 200 which I figured would put me into a lower tier.
Cmon Steve you are smart enough to know that a few individual cases does not have much meaning to the population.Recent studies are suggesting that for longevity it is better to be fit and slightly overweight than to be skinny and sedentary.
I just like to be in shape because I sleep better, feel better and have a better self image. I love going to the gym and kicking it's ass At 1st I hated it now I am really into and enjoy the soreness the next day.
At 1st I hated it now I am really into and enjoy the soreness the next day.I'm 5 11 and weigh 185 pounds. I get lots of exercise in the summer but pretty much sit on the buns all winter. I really do enjoy myself though I am not in the shape I was 10 years ago. My nick name with the ladies was "Hollywood"
Also, drink a couple shots of liquor each night (I prefer Jameson). This does wonders for longevity. Willard Scott asks these old people what the secret to their longevity is when he does his birthday segments. The answer is almost always, "I have a shot of whiskey a day with my tea."
Drink up!
so I just bumped into this thread, I know it's a little late.
I'm 22, I haven't accomplished anything yet, I am jobless although I am going to school. I am terrified of dying. I think about it several times a week and sometimes I feel like I am about to give myself a panic attack. I don't have religion so I don't believe that there is anything after you die, and thats whats scares me the most. Forever is a long time not to exist, and almost every night I ask "Why do people have to die?" :frown:
I'm 22, I haven't accomplished anything yet, I am jobless although I am going to school. I am terrified of dying. I think about it several times a week and sometimes I feel like I am about to give myself a panic attack. I don't have religion so I don't believe that there is anything after you die, and thats whats scares me the most. Forever is a long time not to exist, and almost every night I ask "Why do people have to die?" :frown:
Re: The journey begins
You've got a bit of a journey ahead to find yourself, my friend. Lots of reading, thinking and talking to do. But you can work thru these issues with the same kind of effort as you'd put into studying for college. Start with the simple belief that there are lots of folks around you, young and old, who can help. Verbalizing your fears here was a start. Good luck.
I have the same belief as you, however at 22, you really have nothing to worry about unless you're doing some really stupid things. Granted, an accident can happen any time, but the likelihood is extremely slim, just ask life insurance companies ... if they're willing to write you a 30 year policy for next to nothing, statistically they know you'll be around in 30 years
. When I was in my 20s, I was a crazy party animal and wondered if I'd make it to 30. I'm 40 now, so obviously somehow I made it. At 22 don't let it worry you, seriously you're far too young. I'm not worried about dying, I know it will come someday, but why worry... I'm more worried about my parents dying. They're in their 60s, don't take care of themselves, and barely know their grandchildren. My dad has smoked for 50+ years and already had one heart attack and bypass surgery. The day he got out of the hospital, I remember going out to eat at Cheesecake Factory and he ordered the sliders... a basket of hamburgers. That bothers me far more than whether or not I'll die any time soon. Besides, if I die, my wife gets a ton of money and while it would suck for my wife and kids not to have me around, at least financially they would be far better off than they are now. My wife is still attractive enough that she'd find another dad for them .
Try philosophy.
For the French Existentialists/Absurdists, nothing can make up for our mortality. It is the central fact of our existence and it defines us.
But even they find meaning and value in the struggle against the Absurd (the difference between the way we wish things were and the way they are, as ultimately expressed in our mortality). The struggle is not that you overcome mortality or the Absurd but that you overcome yourself and face the world head on, authentically.
As William Faulkner wrote:
When the shadow of the sash appeared on the curtains it was between seven and eight o' clock and then I was in time again, hearing the watch. It was Grandfather's and when Father gave it to me he said I give you the mausoleum of all hope and desire; it's rather excruciating-ly apt that you will use it to gain the reducto absurdum of all human experience which can fit your individual needs no better than it fitted his or his father's. I give it to you not that you may remember time, but that you might forget it now and then for a moment and not spend all your breath trying to conquer it. Because no battle is ever won he said. They are not even fought. The field only reveals to man his own folly and despair, and victory is an illusion of philosophers and fools."
I recommend The Stranger and The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus and Nausea by Jean Paul Sartre.
There is a great little book literally, How A Man Thinketh. Read it. It will help. If you like I will give you one million in cash for the 20 years between your age and mine. As a matter of fact I will give you everything I own for those 20 years. You are so lucky to be 22 you have no clue. You have very little to worry about. Biggest problem I see is if you are worring now at 22 you need to get a handle on it or you will be the same wreck I was in my late 30's. When I was in my 20's I too worried about dying. It scared me. Hey I am now 42 and you are 22 both of us have exactly 100% of our lives left and I refuse to spend mine in a state worry. I am sure you have heard the two dogs poem, but if not here it is....(you can replace anger with the horrible thoughts)
A young boy came to his Grandfather, filled with anger at a another boy who had done him an injustice.
The old Grandfather said to his grandson "Let me tell you a story. I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and hate does not hurt your enemy. Hate is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times."
"It is as if there are two wolves inside me; one wolf is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offence when no offence was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way. But the other wolf, is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper."
"He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, because his anger will change nothing. Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, because both of the wolves try to dominate my spirit."
The boy looked intently into his Grandfather's eyes and asked, "Which wolf will win, Grandfather?" The Grandfather smiled and said, "The one I feed."
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Another quote.... Just replace the word free with the word young and although you don't know it now in 20 years when you are my age you will understand.
Quote from Shawshank Redemption. I find I'm so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend, and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope.
In 20 years you you will be 42 and as Rob said you have little to worry about over the next 20 years. You are pretty much in the all clear. Now Rob and I we will be in our sixties in 20 years. There is something to think about. Stop worrying about your future there is really nothing you can do to change it anyways. If you must worry think about what it is you would regret not doing if you received horrible news tomorrow. Go do it. I bet if you really thought about it you would more scared for the people around you than you are for yourself. Make sure you let the people around you know how important they are to you. Tell them how you feel every chance you get. And be sure to celebrate being young you won't get another chance to be young again, life is not a dress rehearsal.
Be sure to enjoy the ride on the morning train the afternoon train and the midnight train. I know for a fact the first two are a lot of fun.
Some great posts in here guys. Thanks for the read
I am 40 + but don't feel it. Don't look it either (so the mrs. tells me):biggrin:
Lift weights, good for the body and keeps fat off. I keep some dumbells behind the sofa and work out when the kids go to bed.
And finally, stop sweating the small things in life. Just not worth it.:smile:
Lift weights, good for the body and keeps fat off. I keep some dumbells behind the sofa and work out when the kids go to bed.
And finally, stop sweating the small things in life. Just not worth it.:smile:
Besides, if you truly feel that there is nothing after you die (as I said, I agree), then what's the point in worrying. If that's true, then after you die, you will not miss anything, worry about anything or care about anything you have or haven't done. So it's sort of silly to worry about something that once it happens all the worrying you've done accomplished nothing except to make you a wreck.
Why be in shit shape and tired all of the time when you are here? Why not make the best of it, feel good and look good. I know when I goto the gym I feel better and am just in a better mood overall. You can die at any second you never know. Don't have time for the gym? Well then you are just lazy you can make time but if you value making money before your health that's your choice.
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